vision quest

the cards have been punched
the screens and hearts of a million americans have been touched

john kerry stands proud naked
excepting a headress made of teeth and gonads, his kills in vietnam
at his podium
fastened to the stern of a swift boat
idling on the delaware
war paint smeared in the folds of his well-worn mondalelike face

john edwards
on a leash
purring at his hairy
salt-and-pepper feet

a beatles song plays faintly
backwards in the background

"I bu-errried Paul"

"I bu-errrried Paul"

a beaming Usama sends the happy president elect a suicide bouqet

and dick cheney returns to the ocean until the time when he is once again awakened by nuclear testing off the coast of china
angered and ready to exact revenge
capitalizing upon the follies of man


-or, conversely-

dubya wins
the flamingest of gays handpicked by the Log Cabin Republicans
are shot from cannons onto Wall Street
like so much colorful confetti

an appreciative Osama sends the reigning incumbent a suicide bouqet

as Puff Diddy takes to the streets,
macing and (bitch)slapping
on a coast to coast
all-ghetto tour

he spares no expense
calling forth the ranks
of vote or die battallions
the G-Units, the No Limit Soldiers, the Ruff Ryders
and even the P. Funk Guitar Army

documentainmentarian Michael Moore and poppunkpogomogul Fat Mike
rather than slink off into obscurity
float off the coast to form their own sovereign island nations
in accordance with maritime law

jello biafra defects to his own brain

and americans return to their solemn duty of passively stalking one or both of the Olsen Twins